


Walk Together

by BookishSimon



Category: Heartstopper (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst, Anorexia, Dog - Freeform, Dogs, Fluff, Food, M/M, Mental Illness, Narlie, Nature, Nellie - Freeform, alice oseman - Freeform, heartstopper - Freeform, it's complicated - Freeform, osemanverse - Freeform, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-31 02:25:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17840630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BookishSimon/pseuds/BookishSimon
Summary: Nick picks up Charlie from the mental hospital to go for a walk with Nellie.





	Walk Together

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning for anorexia.

Nick stood in front of the glass door and looked inside. The mental hospital didn’t look anything like he’d imagined. The coat hangers on the walls held up raincoats and denim jackets. There were no straightjackets anywhere in sight. A nurse walked up to him and pressed her card to a scanner on her side of the door. The door slid open. 

“Good evening,” she said. “How can I help you?”

Her voice was warm and pleasant. She didn’t sound like the demons he’d imagined torturing his boyfriend. 

“I’m Nick Nelson. I’m here for Charlie.”

“Charlie Hall or Charlie Spring?”

“Spring,” he said. The nurse nodded. 

“Right. I’ll go get him. Are you planning to go outside with him?”

“Yeah. We’re going to walk my dog. Is that okay?” He held up the leash in his hand, as if to prove to her that he wasn’t lying. 

The nurse frowned. “Is it a big dog?” she asked. The concern in her voice was palpable. I held my hand a little under my knee, to indicate Nellie’s medium size. 

The nurse sighed. “Okay, but don’t let him hold the leash. Be back at eight. And call us if something happens. Do you have the number?”

“Yeah.” He did. Saving the number to his phone had been the first thing he’d done when he’d heard that Charlie had been institutionalized. Christ. Institutionalized. What an ugly word. It sounded too clinical, as if people with paper masks in front of their mouths were prodding Charlie’s brain with scalpels. He preferred to think of it as a hotel for people with mental problems. And really, that was what it looked like. According to Charlie, this place had more in common with a low budget motel than with a hospital.

The nurse turned around and walked away. Charlie’s room must be somewhere around the corner. Nick wondered how he’d decorated it. Were the patients here even allowed to decorate? It would be pretty depressing if not. He had a Polaroid of the two of them in his pocket. He didn’t want to admit it, it felt terribly arrogant, but a part of him hoped that if he could just make Charlie think of him then his anorexia would maybe get better. If Charlie looked at his face, maybe he would remember how much he was hurting Nick by not eating. He didn’t want to guilt trip him into eating, but if that was what it took…it felt awful to turn a photo of them into a tool to pressure Charlie into eating, but it felt worse to see Charlie fade away right in front of him. Nick ran his thumb along the edges of the Polaroid while he waited for Charlie to appear.

When he did, his breath stopped in his throat. It wasn’t quite as bad as his worst fears, but it wasn’t good either. He looked as if he might fall over if Nick breathed on him. Next to Nick, who had just come from rugby training, he looked tiny. Like a Barbie doll next to a Rottweiler. Ironically, it made Nick sick to his stomach to see Charlie like this. He forced his lips into a smile. Smiling became a little easier when Charlie smiled back at him. It looked genuine. He was actually happy to see him. The doors slid open.

“Hi,” Nick said.

“Hi. How are you?”

“I’m the one who should be asking you.”

Charlie laughed. “We can both ask it.” His expression grew a bit more serious.

“I’m okay,” he said. “Just tired.”

Nick had heard that too many times to find it comforting, but he nodded anyway.

“Good. Same here. Just got back from rugby.”

“Did you score?”

“Nope. Almost, though.” I was too distracted by the fact that I was running around on a green field while my boyfriend is rotting away in an institution, he almost said but didn’t. He knew that Charlie’s smile would disappear if he did. Instead, he pulled the Polaroid out of his pocket.

“I got you this. For in your room. Uh, are you allowed to decorate?” He looked at the nurse, who was already on the other side of the door.

“No, but that’s okay. I’ll tape it to the inside of my closet. They always tell us when they’re going to check our rooms. I’ll hide it.”   
Charlie stood on his toes and kissed him on the cheek.

“Thank you. I love it.”

I love you, Nick thought

“No problem. It’s a good photo.”

Nick held up the leash again. 

“Let’s go,” he said. Charlie looped his arm through his. It was difficult to go down the stairs like that, but they managed. It was fun, in a watching-a-clumsy-toddler way. Nick didn’t allow himself to think too much about why Charlie might need the support of his arm.

Nellie was happy to see Charlie again. She ran to jump up against him. Nick saw the smile on Charlie’s face stiffen and die. He intercepted Nellie and picked her up. Her fur hung in front of his face, but he turned his head to look at Charlie. He looked sad. Nick picked up Nellie’s paw and waved it at him. Nellie herself didn’t seem to mind. That did the trick. Charlie smiled again and handed him the leash. Nick put it around Nellie’s neck and wordlessly offered his arm to Charlie.

The park was almost empty. Nick’s eyes still weren’t used to the fact that they didn’t have to hide. They constantly wandered around, scanning the area for potential enemies, like in a video game. It was unnecessary. It was okay if someone saw him and Charlie walk around like this. This was a nice neighborhood. He wouldn’t be beaten up. Fear lingered. It was like a mosquito. Even after you’d killed the cause, it still itched. Charlie squeezed his arm. Nick looked at him and saw worry in his eyes. He shook his head. It should be the other way around. Charlie let go of his arm and instead took his hand. Nellie ran ahead of them, regularly circling back with a twig or an interesting leaf she’d found. 

They sat down in the kitchen. Nellie laid down on the carpet, exhausted from her walk. Nick made himself a cup of tea. He held the bag up to Charlie.

“You want one too?”

He shook his head. “No thanks. I’ll just have water.”

“You sure? There are like, zero calories in this.” Nick hated hearing himself say that, but Charlie drinking nothing but water was driving him nuts. Charlie bit his lip. He knew that his logic was insane. Literally. Even so, his mind just kept telling him that anything added to the water would be polluting it. It wouldn’t be pure. It wouldn’t keep him thin. It wouldn’t be okay. Nothing would be okay if he drank anything other than water. Nick sighed. Charlie hated the sound. He let the tap run. Nick had already stopped sighing. The sound of the running water couldn’t erase the sigh from Charlie’s memory. Regardless, the water was comforting. He let it stream over his hand. He was freezing. The water was warm. 

When he got back to his room, he tore of a piece of tape with his teeth and stuck the Polaroid to the inside of his closet. He smiled. Nick was right. It was a good photo. It was a memory of better times. There was a knock at the door. Charlie hurriedly slammed the closet door shut and told the nurse to come in. 

“Your boyfriend gave me this,” she said. He looked at her hand. It was holding a teabag. Charlie stiffened. 

“Thank you,” he said. The nurse nodded and closed the door behind her. Charlie sank down on his bed. Why had he given him this? Was it an insult? No. Nick would never do that. It was a token of faith. Charlie’s chest glowed with both guilt and love at the thought. He brought the teabag to his nose and smelled it. Mint. He couldn’t drink it now. Still, he put it on his desk. It was a reminder. And a promise.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this! This was a nice change from writing my book. Way less pressure to write well here. Still, I hope it wasn't total garbage.   
> (Oh, and by the way, the mental hospital is based on the one I went to in Belgium. IDK anything about mental hospitals in the UK. Sorry if got things wrong on that front.)


End file.
